


Too Late to Apologize

by BluePlanetTrash



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Altean Lance (Voltron), Angst, Bullied Lance, Bullying, Gen, Lance is Allura's Brother, Langst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-01-10
Packaged: 2019-03-02 23:51:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13329060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BluePlanetTrash/pseuds/BluePlanetTrash
Summary: When Lance discovered that Allura was his sister after falling from the cryopod, he thought that his life would become better. He didn't think that his team would begin to push him away. One person can only take so much after all.





	Too Late to Apologize

When Lance first climbed out of the pod, it was a decidedly too familiar experience. He didn’t know why he knew it of where he knew it from but it wasn’t the first time he had experienced it. Falling asleep that night, he found himself not surrounded by the blue waters of Cuba, but instead a field of pink flowers under a setting sun.

“Lance!” He looked behind him and saw Allura coming towards him. His eyebrow rose in confusion. This kind of looked like the kind of dream you had when you had a crush, but he knew for certain that he didn’t have a crush on Allura.

“Come on Lance!” She cheered when she got close enough to grab his hand. He looked up and realized that she looked several years younger than usual. Well, you know, thousands of years younger but still.

“Where are we going?” He asked. He blinked when the words came out without him meaning to.

“Mother and Father are waiting for us,” she answered picking him up under the arms and carrying him away on her hip. Okay, this was definitely not a crush dream now. Why the heck was he so tiny?

“How was your day?” She asked looking down at his face with fondness in her eyes.

“Great! I got to play in the juniberries all day!” He chirped resting his cheek on her shoulder to look up at her with big blue eyes. She cooed and stroked a hand down his cheek as they made their way up the hill.

‘That’s the Castle,’ Lance thought looking over the horizon to see the big white pillars looming over the city.

“Allura! Lance!”

“Mama!” He cried cheerfully looking at the approaching woman. Allura set him down and he ran over to her, clutching his hands in the fabric of her dress. She laughed and picked him up the same way that Allura did. He nuzzled her cheek with his and clutched around her neck in a tight hug. Looking over her shoulder, he could see King Alfor approaching them with a relaxed smile.

“Papa!” He cheered again but stayed holding on to his mother as his father ruffled his hair. Wait. When did he start thinking of them as his parents? His parents were back home on Earth. Weren’t they?

“Hello, Lance! How was your day with Coran?” He asked with a grin. Lance pushed his head into his mother’s shoulder, hiding from his father.

“Hmm? What’s wrong? Wait, where’s Coran?” He asked concerned, turning confused half way through. He looked down at the top of his son’s head with a raised brow.

“I just wanted to see the juniberries but Coran was too slow,” Lance admitted after a moment of silence. Alfor sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, making Lance shrink a bit at the obvious disappointment.

“You’re right, Coran is pretty slow,” Alfor said after a moment, “but he also worries, so let’s get back and apologize to him okay?” Lance looked down and nodded his head as his chin wobbled slightly. He didn’t mean to make Coran worry. He just wanted to see the juniberries.

“It’s okay Lance, as long as you apologize, no one will be angry,” Alfor said, ruffling his hair again. He leaned into the hand, taking as much comfort from it as possible.

He was right, Coran did worry. A lot. As soon as they saw the man, he sprinted over to make sure Lance was alright. He apologized profusely to Alfor, which was waved over before Lance was pushed slightly towards the man. He dug his toe into the floor beneath him and gave a stuttering apology to the man.

“I’m just glad that you’re safe,” Coran cried pulling Lance into a hug. The guilt of not telling Coran was overwhelming again and he clutched his shirt in his hand as he tried to fight away the tears again.

“None of that my boy,” Coran said gently wiping away a few of the tears that leaked out. He hesitated but nodded and wiped his face on the sleeve of his shirt. After he was sure that he wasn’t crying anymore, he gave the man a big smile.

“Now then, I believe it’s bedtime?” He asked looking up at the king and queen. They nodded and he looked back at Lance. He stood and took Lance’s hand and guided him away from the three of them. Looking back, they gave him a wave and smile as they walked away down the hallway.

As much as Lance loved the man; it was extremely awkward that he helped him get dressed for bed. The tucking in part was kind of nice though.

“Goodnight,” Coran said as he quietly left the room.

“Goodnight Coran,” he stared up at the ceiling.  
‘What now? Am I just going to go to sleep? In a dream?’ he sighed and kicked to covers off of himself, finally able to control what his body was doing.

‘Sleep is for the weak’ He walked around the room, picking up objects and turning them around trying to figure out what it did, or how it worked. A sudden flash of white in his peripherals suddenly caught his attention as he was walking to the other side of the room. He turned and saw a large ornate mirror but that wasn’t the thing that really caught his attention.

His hair was white.

He rushed over in a panic and stared into the mirror. He caught his own eyes in the mirror and flinched back as memories started rushing through his head. Everything was coming back to him.

The short life he had on Altea, his family, his father’s friends, Voltron, the days leading up to the attack, even waking up for the first time on Earth and being saved by the McClain’s. Everything.

He touched the crown on his head, marvelling the similarities to Allura’s. Allura. His sister. A deep sense of affection came over him at the thought of the princess and he longed for one of her hugs at that moment.

* * *

He blinked his eyes open, the deep sense of longing still in his chest. Looking over at the clocks that Hunk and Pidge had installed in their bedrooms, he saw that it was just past 2:30 in the morning. He jumped up from his bed and into his bathroom to long in the mirror. He knew that he had just woken from a dream but it had felt so real, in some ways he wanted it to be true. He went through his memories and remembered Coran teaching him how to shift. He still didn’t know if it was true but he looked into the mirror and tried anyway.

“Oh my god,” he breathed out when he saw the roots of his hair lose all colour and bleed to the tips with white. Trying harder his ears pointed and his eyes brightened, greenish blue scales appearing under them as well. Just like his father, he realized with a giddy smile. It was true! It was all true! He ran to the door, he had to go tell Allura and Coran. Just before he made it to the frame, he transformed to how he usually looked. It was a surprise after all.

It was weird, he remembered not being able to navigate these hallways but now he could pass every room and know what it was and who used to spend a lot of time in there. He saw Coran’s room coming up but decided that he would tell Allura first. She might be harder to convince, especially all the flirting he did. Fake as it was, it was still flirting.

The door quietly slipped open and he crept closer to her bed. When he got within a few feet of her, her eyes blearily opened in his direction. After a split second, they snapped open and she hurtled a pillow directly in his face. The force of it made him fall back with pain filled groan.

“What the quiznack are you doing in here?” She hissed murderously. He actually trembled, never knowing that she could look that angry but he quickly spoke up.

“I have something to tell you,”

“Can’t it wait until morning Lance?”

“No,”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,”

“Alright, what is it?” She sighed pinching the bridge of her nose. Lance snorted at the similarity between her and their father. She quirked a brow at him waiting.

“Don’t worry, you’ll love it,” he assured her. He stood and closed his eyes, the transformation came over him with a warm wave and he opened his eyes to look at Allura. Her mouth and eyes were wide open as he looked at him.

“Lance?” She asked quietly, covering her mouth with her hand while tears welled up in her eyes. He nodded and immediately her arms were coming around him and pressing him to her chest. He smiled and nuzzled his face into her neck with a happy whine.

“How did this happen?” She asked stepping back to hold his face in her hands.

“I don’t know, I didn’t exactly understand what was happening then either,” he admitted with a shrug. “I just know that I got my memories back after I got out of the pod,”

“Well, it doesn’t matter, it only matters that you’re here,” she said joyfully hugging him again with a laugh. She pulled away a second later when a thought came to her.

“Wait! Did you tell Coran?”

“No, I wanted to tell you first,”

“Good choice,” she said. They walked out of the room towards Coran though, their hands swinging between each other. Neither of them were ready to let go after so many years. Coming up to the door, they knocked and after only a few seconds Coran opened it up, looking like he hadn’t even gone to sleep yet. He went to address Allura when he glanced at Lance and saw the shock of white on his head.

“Prince Lance?” He asked hesitantly, hands shaking in front of him as if he wanted to embrace him, but wasn’t quite sure if he was dreaming or not.

“It’s me, Coran,” he replied quietly. Coran composure fell away and two single tear tracks fell down his face as he quietly enveloped Lance in a strong hug. Something about the way the normally excited and loud man was acting got to Lance. His lip and chin began quivering and he clutched to his shirt, strikingly similar to the way he apologized in his dream.

“We never knew what happened to you,” Coran said into his hair. Lance sniffled and burrowed further into his chest. “We didn’t know where you went, if you were alive, or if we would ever see you again,”

“I’m here now though,” Lance whispered. Coran nodded but didn’t seem to be close to letting him go for now. A warmth enveloped his back and he realized that Allura had latched onto him.

“When do we tell the rest of the paladins?” Allura asked muffled from his shirt.

“I’ll tell them, but maybe not until we save the Balmera? We need to focus on one thing at a time,” they nodded in agreement and let themselves sink back into the comfort of each other.

* * *

He didn’t tell them after they got back from the Balmera. It’s actually been weeks since the Balmera and he still hasn’t told anybody.

“I just don’t understand Lance,” Allura deadpanned as she painted his fingernails blue.

“Well, you’re the princess of the Castle and I don’t want them to tolerate me just back I’m your brother,” he admitted.

“Oh come on Lance, they like you,” she scoffed. He stared at her blankly. “What?”

“Could you honestly say that if I wasn’t your brother that you would like me?” He asked. Allura’s mouth dropped open in shock.

“Of course I would, your first impression might have been a bit off-putting, but it was after that, that I saw the real you. You’re kind, selfless, encouraging, and trusting, and that’s only a few of your traits,” she said with a smile.

“I just don’t feel ready yet,” he admitted. She nodded in understanding and blew on the wet paint.

“It’s all up to you Lance, they were your friends first,”

“Thanks, Allura,”

“You’re welcome,”

* * *

Little did Allura or Coran know, there was more to the reason why Lance didn’t want to tell them. While it was true that Lance wanted them to like him for who he was, but it was also because he knew for certain they would hide their disdain in order to keep Allura and Coran happy.

“Can you pass me the greyish package?” Hunk asked, staring into the mixing bowl on the counter.

“Yup,” he chirped sliding it right into his open palm. With a thank you, he ripped open the package and carefully sprinkled it into the bowl. There was a loud gurgle before the contents of the bowl exploded in his face. Hunk groaned and wiped his face off before he chucked the bowl into the sink.

“Well I’m done cooking for the day, wanna hang out?” He asked, turning to Lance with a wide smile.

“Sure,” Lance nodded with a smile. They went to leave the room but Pidge barged in and took Hunk by the arm and started dragging him away.

“What? Pidge?” Hunk asked confused.

“I need your help with something,” she stated simply. He pulled his arm away from her and turned back to Lance.

“Can it wait? Lance and I were about to go hang out,” he said looking back to where Lance stood, his hands twisted in his grip.

“Ugh, so what? It’s just Lance,” Pidge groaned gesturing to him. He shrunk a bit where he stood but gave the two of them a smile.

“It’s okay Hunk, you can go, there isn’t much we could really do anyway,” he said with a small wave.

“Are you sure?” He asked hesitantly looking back over at Pidge.

“Yeah! We can always find something to do after you’re finished,” he said cheerfully.

“Okay…” he trailed off as he started following Pidge to the hangers. He kept his eyes on Lance until he disappeared from his vision.

He sighed as Hunk and Pidge disappeared around the corner. What now? He left the kitchen and began pacing the halls. This had been happening for a while now; at least two weeks. It wasn’t just Pidge either, Keith was being really mean too, and even Shiro was being unreasonable when it came to comments on his training. The only one that seemed to be treating him kindly was Hunk but that wasn’t much of a surprise. At least it had all been when Allura and Coran weren’t paying attention. He didn’t want to bother them with it. As he passed the training deck doors, he decided that he should train for a while and walked in.

After training for a while he heard the door open and he looked over to see Keith walking in. He glanced up to see Lance, he didn’t know how else to describe it but a scowl.

“I want to train, so get out,” he bit out. Lance’s eyes widened at the tone and he froze in place.

“I won’t take up much room, we can both use it,” Lance tried to reason with a smile. Keith rolled his eyes and walked closer to the Altean.

“I don’t want to share it with you,” he said bitterly. Lance backed away slightly from him as he continued walking forward.

“Well, we could work on our team work then?” He suggested. Keith growled and marched straight up to him.

“Don’t you get it? I don’t want to work with you, you idiot, you’ll fuck it up somehow,” he snarled poking him harshly in the chest. “Just like this team, the only reason that you’re even on it is because the blue lion needs a place holder,”

Lance flinched back away from the finger and searched Keith’s face for any sort of remorse for his words. When he didn’t find any, he looked down at the ground and quickly made his way to the deck door.

“Sorry,” he said quickly before he left the room completely. He only heard a grunt in return. It’s okay. As long as you apologize, no one will be angry.

* * *

“Lance! You’re not even trying anymore!” Shiro yelled looking down at the boy on the mat. He stared up at Shiro with wide eyes and scrambled to his feet.

“I’m sorry,” he stammered out. His hands shook at his sides. He didn’t mean to make Shiro angry, he trying as hard as he could.

“Sorry, isn’t good enough,” he heard sniggers coming from the side of the mat and looked over to see Keith and Pidge smirking at the mat while Hunk looked concerned at Lance. A hand reached out and roughly grabbed his chin, yanking it back to look at Shiro’s face.

“Pay attention when I’m talking to you,” Shiro said sternly with a glare. Lance nodded as well as he could and Shiro let go of him.

“I don’t understand what is wrong with you, I show you exactly how to do the move and you never do it right,” he started again. “If you want to keep your position on the team, you’re going to have to start actually trying,”

At that Lance’s eyes widened even further. He couldn’t kick him off of the team, blue chose him, didn’t she? Panic took over him, he was trying, he was trying so hard but he just didn’t understand. He wasn’t strong like Allura was, he still had to train with her to be able to be that strong.

“No, please, I’m trying Shiro, please don’t kick me off the team,” he pleaded gripping onto Shiro’s shirt.

“Well, you don’t act like it Lance, if you were actually trying you might even be caught up with the rest of us,” he stated, grabbing Lance’s wrists and ripping his hands off of his shirt. He walked away, leaving Lance to look down at the ground mournfully. He walked past Keith and Pidge and they followed him out of the room, talking and laughing loudly.

“Don’t listen to him buddy,” Hunk said quietly walking up behind Lance and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“He’s right though, I’m such a screw-up, I can’t even get practice moves right,” Lance whispered, tears welling up in his eyes.

“You know what? No, he was clearly ganging up on you, he paired up Pidge and Keith and you were practicing on me and him, there is a clear disadvantage,” he spat, anger at the leader overcoming his usually cheerful personality.

“No, it’s not his fault, he just wants me to be better,” he said with a fragile smile. Hunk’s eyes widened with tears. He couldn’t believe that his friend wasn’t furious at the treatment he was getting from the rest of the paladins. He wasn’t blind, he could see that they were hurting him. That’s why he started spending every moment with him. It used to work before but now they didn’t even care if he was in the room before they started berating Lance. The only ones that hadn’t seen nor contributed to what Lance was going through, were the Alteans. He didn’t believe that they bully Lance as well but he didn’t want to risk it, especially since Lance was a bit worried about his position on the team.

“Lance, you’re so much more than you think you are,” Hunk pleaded pulling him into a hug. Lance sighed but hugged Hunk back, he didn’t want to worry him.

“I’m going to go to bed,” he said after a few minutes. Hunk nodded from where his face was buried in Lance’s neck and stepped back. They separated ways through the doorway, as Hunk headed towards the kitchen instead. He sighed when he was sure that Hunk would be out of earshot. All he wanted to do right now was go to bed and try to forget about the day.

“Quite the spectacle on the mats today Lance,” Keith said from behind him. He turned and saw him and Pidge standing with smirks on their faces.

“I know, I’m sorry, but I’m really trying guys, I swear,” he said honestly.

“Obviously not hard enough, I mean it would be easier for the team to just find someone else instead of wasting our time training you,” Pidge complained. She and Keith turned and started walking away from him.

“Maybe we could find someone who is actually smart, or you know, contributes in someway,” Keith laughed.

Lance glared down at the floor, his face was hot as he tried to keep in the tears that wanted to fall. He clenched his teeth and ran into his room. He picked up his bag from the closet and began stuffing his things into it. Fine, if they wanted to replace him, that was fine with him. He walked to his childhood bedroom and took small trinkets that had been given to him by various people, including a small stuffed mouse that Coran had sewn for him, a pressed juniberry from Allura, and his crown. When he first saw it in the room, he wasn’t sure why it was there but he remembered that he didn’t wake up with it when he got to Earth. After he was packing his bag he returned to his paladin room; he couldn’t leave while everyone was still awake. They would try to stop him, well, Hunk, Coran and Allura might try to stop him.

* * *

Leaving the Castle. His home. For the second time, felt like someone was ripping his heart straight out of his chest. It was for the good of the time though, they would be able to find a more suitable paladin for Blue. One that was smarter, stronger, and more reliable then he could be.

He forced himself to fly away faster when he started hearing Blue’s mournful roars in the back of his head. There were so many things he wanted to say to her. Thank you for picking me and taking me away from Earth. Thank you for reuniting me with my family. Thank you for taking care of me when I couldn’t take care of myself. Thank you for understanding, even though I’m hurting you. Thank you for loving me.

* * *

The paladins were awakened by the scream of the alarm. By this time they were used to it and were quickly standing at attention in front of Allura and Coran. Strangely, their faces were pale and they were frantically searching across the holo-screens.

“Um, princess?” Shiro asked. She held a finger for him to wait as she typed onto one of the screens, after it flashed red she cursed and turned to the paladins.

“Lance is missing, he took one of the pods and left in the middle of the night,” he told them quickly, chewing on her thumbnail. “We need to suit up and try to find him,”

“What?” They all replied. Hunk with a concerned surprise, while Shiro, Keith, and Pidge looked a bit relieved and somewhat excited at the news. They bumped Shiro forward a bit at the news and he took a few steps towards her.

“Princess, do you really think that this is the best course of action?” He asked. Her head snapped towards him in disbelief.

“What are you talking about?”

“Well, maybe this is a sign that we find a new paladin instead,” Shiro suggested rubbing the back of his neck. Hunk’s mouth dropped open behind him, while Keith and Pidge eagerly stepped up to back his suggestion.

“Someone who is less annoying and actually takes things seriously,” Keith added coming up beside Shiro.

“And can actually understand what is going on, instead of just saying that they’re trying,” Pidge whined trying to imitate Lance.

“We can’t replace Lance,” Hunk cried running forward to stand beside Allura and face the paladins.

“Oh, come on Hunk, there are so many better options for a paladin,” Pidge scoffed shrugging her shoulders. They looked to gauge the reaction of the Alteans and froze when they saw Allura looking at them blankly. She pointed to them with a trembling hand.

“You’re the reason why he has been doubting himself?” She asked dangerously. They glanced over at Coran and found him looking at them with wide eyes.  
“He wasn’t trying as hard as he could have been, we had to start being hard on him,” Shiro tried to explain.

“You weren’t being hard on him, you were bullying him,” Hunk argued, getting into Shiro’s face.

“Bullying?” Coran asked confused.

“Tormenting someone for no reason, except to feel good about themselves,” Hunk explained not looking away from Shiro.

“What?!” Allura screamed enraged.

“Oh, whatever! He didn’t even try to stand up for himself,” Keith sneered crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“Why do you care so much anyway?” Pidge asked with a scowl.

“Not that any of you deserve to know but he’s my brother,” she snarled. “He’s one of the last Alteans in this universe and you pushed him away from his own home,”

“What? What do you mean? But Lance looks human,”

“Alteans are shapeshifters, he blended in to stay safe, which apparently didn’t help his situation,” Coran informed them, walking away from his station and walking towards them. With every step, he seemed to larger and larger to fury radiating off of him clearly.

“How dare you treat anybody like this, especially Lance,” Allura hissed, glaring at all of them venomously.

“All he wanted to do was help you guys, but you treated him like trash,” Hunk growled at them. “He always tried his best and you just couldn’t accept that,”

They were starting to see the turmoil that they had been putting Lance through, and the entire time all he tried to do, was give them a warm smile. Never once did he spit acid back at them, or try to throw a punch.

“We’re sorry,” Shiro whispered earnestly, shaking his head slightly.

“Don’t apologize to us,” she spat. After all this time, she realized that her father had always been wrong. Even if you apologize, someone will still be angry.

**Author's Note:**

> Come visit me at my Tumblr too!: https://blueplanettrash.tumblr.com/


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